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I'm a Recovering Alcoholic Who Has Been Transformed by Love

I am, as of the 22nd of July, 5 months sober.

Alcoholism, for me began as it usually does. Weekend drinks, dancing, music, fun. But somewhere along the line I lost control. I mean horrible, horrible drunk. A "nice" drunk, don't get me wrong, but a functioning alcoholic, nonetheless.

I would quit and begin again. I've never not known Jesus, but I guess I hadn't been ready to relinquish that control over my life, which in essence I had no control at all. I was baptized again as an adult. Gave my heart to Jesus, but Satan and the alcohol would always take over and I was weak enough to let them.

And one day I woke up. It was close to Mardi gras and I was excited about letting loose and forgetting about the damage I had done to my life

And one day I woke up. It was close to Mardi gras and I was excited about letting loose and forgetting about the damage I had done to my life, my health, how bad the people close to me were hurting just watching me basically kill myself and I decided this was it. I prayed and I prayed and I prayed. And I quit. Not without the help of my doctor, but I quit quietly at home with my cats instead of in a detox facility worrying about my cats. I would never have been able to focus on recovery worrying about my cats.

I quit alcohol. I'm still working on some things but feel like I am closer to Jesus, closer to the Lord every day and he has stuck by me and I stick by him and he has placed some amazing people in my life recently and I couldn't be more blessed!

In addition to everything that has been going on, I am partially homeless. So, in essence I have become one of them and I am enjoying the feeling of a little protection as well as sharing a seat with them at the dinner table, so to speak.

At first it was embarrassing, demeaning, degrading, frightful and HOT! It's 100° outside every day and people are miserable.

But there are so many kind people who bring us food, water, money, prayers and hope. I have never been humbled like this before and the best part of it is.....I am sober. I feel the love. I see the things I wouldn't have seen from the outside looking in.

I am ok. I'm not frightened.

This morning I wanted a simple picture of myself to represent the awesome work that Wearing Love is doing and for the wonderful concept that is breathing life back into the people who allow WL to share it with them.

Joy Ike's song "I don't know anything" has been played for me and my homeless friends and I today, so let this photo truly reflect everything it stands for. You can put away your pride and humble yourself to the Lord, and you will feel the love. You can have your cigarettes and your lighter stolen by someone you cared about and be mad as the devil when another soul is saved, but you still love and forgive.

Anyway that's the synopsis. The abridged version. If I can inspire anyone who is walking in my old shoes, I certainly will!

Today I am grateful for love and I am wearing love loud and proud all the way down here in Cajun Country! Woot woot shout out to the Lord I LOVE!

Thanks for reading!!!

Carrie (The Midget)

Laplace, Louisiana

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